Well. Today I found myself freaking out just a little about something and it started me thinking about why I was REALLY freaking out and that got me thinking about my recently acquired awareness of my need to try to control things.
So I started thinking about plans.
I love to plan. I am good at it. But I am also very aware that almost always, plans change. Often times more then once. I know that I will do better and be happier with life in general if I try to just relinquish control a little bit and instead just relax.
Its like I have a certain plan in my head, and then if things don't go the way I expected them to, for quite a while I kick and claw and fight and do everything I can to fix it. And to fix it means to get it back to my original plan. To make whatever the reality is fit into whatever I plan I had created.
But, usually I cant fix it.
Not being able to fix it usually infuriates me.
But, if I can just somehow let go of that plan and accept things as they are, then I am suddenly about to see the beauty in the current situation. To see that sometimes it is even better then what I planned. Then suddenly I can enjoy where I am and relax and once again feel surrounded by good things, even though nothing about the actual reality of the situation changed at all.
Sometimes I go through this whole process very quickly. Maybe in the course of 20 minutes lets say.
But sometimes it takes longer.
Lots longer.
But, I am working on speeding the whole thing up.
Have a wonderful weekend chickadees!
PS. Happy lucky Friday the 13th!
