Friday, February 13, 2009

Friday the 13th is my lucky day

Today is Friday the 13th, a day that I have always thought of as lucky more then unlucky for no reason at all really except that I want to.
There are things that I know about myself and things that I don’t, but one thing that I do know is that I am mostly an idealist optimist at heart. I have a little realist in me too, but what always wins the arguments in my head is the idealist part who thinks that things will always be ok, and people are mostly good and always meant whatever they said or did in the best way possible. I think that anticipation of things is part of the fun and I like to have high expectations even if I know that means I am often disappointed. I have high hopes for things and I think that you cant expect to get what you want if you never ask for it.

I am feeling odd lately. Restless, like I need to see a large body of water.
I am missing home and missing the spring.
I don’t know how anyone ever decides on one thing that they want to do with their life.
Someone told me the other day that they don’t believe in luck. But I do believe in it even if all the evidence is stacked against me. And I believe in fate even though its so unlikely.

If I was at home in Oregon I would drive to the beach and stay till very late.

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